...NYE...

...tonight is New Year's Eve. i'll be joining two other couples, who i love and adore. it will be grandest of fun, but i will miss you regardless, being the lone single gal...

...quaking on the inside....

...sometimes on the inside i quake when i think of you and that is when i miss you most...

...at the movies...

...sometimes when i am at the movies i imagine reaching for your hand and hearing you bend close to whisper a funny thing in my ear. how i miss you in those moments....

...a kiss....

...tonight i went to see tangled. it makes me believe that fairy tale kisses might happen in real life. ready for yours....

..christmastime...

...christmas is a favorite holiday. i love relaxing on this day...

...birthday party for Jesus...

...micah participated in his first birthday party for jesus. wow. i about cried when i thought about the legacy being created in this tradition. it makes my heart full tonight...

...a walk in the snow...

...today i woke up and wanted to go for a walk in the snow. no one would go with me. i wish you had been here to go with me...

...citadel of stars...

...citadel of stars has to be one of the most perfect songs. i think it will be a meaningful song for me for whenever you arrive...

..bad dreams..

...i had some bad dreams last night. i wish i knew how to make them go away. i wish you were here to help me figure it out...

...a day alone...

...a day alone left my thoughts banging around my head like a pinball machine. how i wish you could call...

...after the movie....

...went to the movies tonight. now that i'm home alone on my couch, it'd just be nice to have someone else near by...

...laughter....

...rarely do i laugh more than when i'm with nate & morgan. i'm thankful for them and can't wait for you to know them...

...letting it go....

...tonight, driving home 'everything' by Audrey Assad came on and the line "if everything is yours, i'm letting it go, it was never mine to hold..." struck me. even when you are mine...you won't really be mine, so i'm letting it go....

...the green-eyed monster...

...sometimes the green-eyed monster of jealousy creeps up on me and overtakes me. i don't like a jealous me. it feels false and ugly....

...pity parties...

...this week, i threw myself a lovely little pity party. i feel rather sheepish for it now, but i'm glad i was able to remove the heart of it quickly...

...lessons in forgiveness....

...this week, i've learned more about forgiveness, mercy & grace more than I've ever known before. i'm thankful i'm continuing to learn these lessons...

...unprotected...

...sometimes a girl just needs a protector. today was one of those days...